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Hofheimer/Ferrebee P.C. - (757) 425-5200

Hofheimer/Ferrebee P.C.

Need Help? Call (757) 425-5200

OFFICE LOCATIONS

  • Virginia Beach
  • 1060 Laskin Road Suite 12B
    Virginia Beach, VA 23451
  • Phone: (757) 425-5200
  • Fax: (757) 425-6100
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  • Newport News
  • 11815 Fountain Way
    Newport News, VA 23606
  • Phone: 757-425-5200
  • Fax: 757-425-6100
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  • Chesapeake
  • 638 Independence Parkway, Suite 240
    Chesapeake, VA 23320
  • Phone: (757) 425-5200
  • Fax: (757) 425-6100
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Parenting after a Virginia Divorce (Part A)

Raising children is a challenging job even under the best circumstances. When you add a Virginia divorce into the mix, you have a sensitive situation that requires a good deal of patience, time, and specific coping strategies.

As a parent, you can do a lot to help your children get through this trying time. You can also take steps to make sure that any ongoing legal aspects of your divorce-particularly those related to Virginia child custody-go as well as can be expected.

Choose Your Words Carefully

One of the most difficult parts of parenting after Virginia divorce is keeping the venom out of conversations with (and about) your ex when the kids are around.

We all know that divorces can get ugly and that sometimes you feel your emotions are getting the best of you. You might want to call your ex that name that's on the tip of your tongue, and it might even be accurate, but it's in the best interests of your children to hold your anger back.

Children also don't need to know every detail of your break-up. When you're parenting after Virginia divorce, it might be tempting to take older children on as confidantes, but this isn't healthy for you or for them.

It's important for divorced parents to have a support system of peers with whom they can vent their feelings. A therapist can also help you work through your feelings about your divorce.

Be Fair and Reasonable

When you're parenting after Virginia divorce, it pays to be reasonable with Virginia child custody and visitation issues.

Don't try to block him from spending time with the children
, and don't try to turn the kids against him. If the children visit you, bring them back on time, and be civil when dropping them off.

If there are any scheduling conflicts or other issues, try to work them out through talking and cooperation. This will position you as the friendly parent who is willing to be logical and fair-minded.

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Woman filing for divorce in VirginiaWhat Every Virginia Woman Should Know About Divorce is full of thoughtful steps and practical tips that will help you during your separation, divorce, or child custody case including:

-- 20 guidelines for "separation under the same roof"

-- 13 critical factors used to determine spousal support

-- 3 types of property classification recognized by Virginia courts

-- 10 factors your judge must consider in a contested custody case

-- a formula to determine your percentage share of his retirement benefits

-- 38 Financial Records you should be aware of

-- 20 steps to prepare for divorce

-- 7 stages of divorce

-- 40 age-appropriate books about divorce for children

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Charles R. Hofheimer
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